Category Archives: Single lady Chronicles

Ask my shoe of our love affair

In love with heels but baby, we've got to part.
In love with heels but baby, we’ve got to part.

Image credit

I am a typical woman. That statement is loaded with qualities that only women would understand. You know, like having a closet full  of clothes and not being able to find anything worth wearing? Anyone?

Today I’ll not talk about the fullness of my closet  or inadequacy thereof. Today we are all about footwear. You see, I have these gorgeous toenails that need a trendy pair to go with. Someone once told me never to wait for validation from elsewhere. “Celebrate yourself”, he said. So, here’s to me celebrating me.

The thing is I never get shoes that I can walk in comfortably. Just like clothes, my shoe rack is a cemetery of sorts for shoes. It’s either grown too big for my right foot to hold or too small for my right foot, yet while buying them, they seemed to fit perfectly.

Then there’s this problem I have with heels. I know they are gorgeous on my feet, and make me look elegant in photos. I have resigned to be practical. What’s the use of having six inches heels when you can’t find your balance while walking in them?

I know that my birthday is still a long way to come, but just some heads up. Hint hint! Should you feel like blessing this lover of shoes with a pair, please keep off the thin six inches things. We are just avoiding some unpleasant eventualities.

How I miss the good old days when I used to walk in sandals and open shoes. Now, if I dare put on anything without straps, I will kick it while walking and meet it ahead. My right foot cannot hold shoes. It needs support. Which begs the question why there aren’t sandals with straps that hold feet. Why aren’t there slippers for adults with straps? Just thinking out loud.

I look for fashionable flat shoes with straps, and fail to get the right fit. maybe it’s because I am a number 7. My shoe problem is combined  with the big footed girl problems.

Speaking of which, today I just feel like throwing away the pair I am wearing. It is pinching my right foot. I just can’t wait to get home and off these shoes. It was a different story when buying them. They were the darling boots that you’d have to be really blind not to notice. My right foot doesn’t understand that. My right toes cannot fold themselves as my foot expands.

Sometimes I get that pair that fits well. I make it my best friend. I wear it every day. Problem is, the right shoe gets damaged, leaving the left intact. Sometimes I look at my shoes and ask, “are they worn by the same person?”

There’s a bright side in every situation. I get to give away most of my shoes. Sometimes I buy a shoe, walk in it for two three days, when it starts saying, “Darling, I think we need to part.” I oblige. I have learnt to accept things as they are and move on. May be, just maybe, one day I’ll find a shoe that loves me back as much as I love it.

With love from,

Juls.

Thank you my dear ‘Almost’ valentine

advance-happy-valentines-day-wallpaper-images

Thank you for reminding me of my musical side. I even had a dream that you were teaching me the guitar. How we would be the perfect match, you know, the type that’s only read in mills and boon? I had to jolt myself awake from that stupid dream, you know. Thank you!

Thank you for making me dream of the possibility of a relationship with a guy I could have intelligent conversations with. Sing along to his guitar skills on our dates at the park. Maybe read a book together. Side by side, me and you, the perfect couple.

Thank you for making me draw near to God. I thought God must be really merciful. He sent a brother my way, despite my silence toward Him.  And to crown it, he sent a worshiper, a man after His own heart. Who is part of the worship team in church. A man of God!

Thank you for your proposal that clearly, should have left me melting like Ooh! Someone finally asked me to marry them. I am sorry if my response sounded harsh, but it was sincere. WhatsApp proposals are not just my thing.

Thank you for finally gathering courage and meeting me. For the hug, for that short ride in your car. For opening your car like a gentleman and dropping me on the bus stop. I must say you looked sharp in that black suit and red tie.  Prospects to whet a girl’s appetite. Thank you.

Thank you because I now know you are a family man. I remembered congratulating you on your wedding photos, and in person. But then again, many things could have happened after all these years. I was waiting for your explanation. It just didn’t come from you, but thank you, now I know better.

Thank you for the good mornings and good night chats. I must say they boosted my self esteem. You know ‘being alone‘ as your proposal said, sometimes is a curse that single ladies need to be rescued from. Thank you for your efforts.

Thank you, but the messages have to stop. Direct them to the right person. Your wife will really appreciate some goodnight kisses and good morning dear messages on her phone, don’t you think?  I feel complete as a single lady in waiting. But sincerely,  I thank you.

Thank you because I know we will still be good friends, just like old times. Do you remember? We were barely in our 20s, and treated each other with respect. Old friends are good to keep, you know. Thank you for remembering this old friend.

Image credit.

Random date on a Nairobi roundabout

Black Couple

Cupid must be knocking her door, and violently. Just in one week, she has gotten three guys no, make that six, text her, whatsapp, even call her. All with suggestive messages. At this rate, she will  be going, going, gone by end of year.

Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here. Let’s take it slow, shall we? Good!

Moses stranger is one of the guys who have been calling, texting, you know? On Friday he called her and they agreed to meet the next day (Saturday) for an in-depth insight into one another’s world. The first time they met, they just exchanged phone numbers. A girl doesn’t have to be rude, you never know where your prospects for a good relationship might be. She handed him her card because she was also getting late for work.

Now, she just wanted to play the nice girl she has always been. So she leaves her house to go meet the gentle man. At least he is gentle because he waits for her at a petrol station, standing all through while she is late.

She walks past him, having a feint recollection of his appearance since they only had a short encounter before. She looks back to see a slight man smiling at her. It’s 4 pm, an hour late, and she smiles apologetically. Who can get mad at that smile? Only a fool would.

They walk through the petrol station park, look for a spot to sit. It’s full. They cross the road to the roundabout. By this time the guy is telling her how they have not been paid at work, but the important thing was to see her. “Have you been paid”, he asks her.

Really? she thinks to herself. You called this date, do you expect me to foot the bill? She thinks again and smiles.

They get to the roundabout and look around. It looks like the sewer burst and dried on the grass. People are sitting willing off the time, others are sleeping.

He suddenly gets an idea. “Let’s go get something to drink”, he says. They walk back to the fruit vendors who are too eager to make a sale. She chooses to sit where there are no people so they may talk. “I’m glad you came, I almost thought you stood me up”, he says placing a hand on her knee.

“I told  you I was coming didn’t I? Had to keep my word”, she says removing his hand from her knee. The stall owner, a fat lady doesn’t look amused. She comes to take the seats without talking to them. They take the cue and move to  the other stalls, where he buys fruit juice and  they walk back to the roundabout.

They look for a spot to sit in. “The grass seems to be dusty”, he says. “You didn’t carry a lesso for us to sit on?” he asks her.

Rolls her eyes, “I don’t walk with lessos”, she replies. And I didn’t expect to come sit in a dusty roundabout. She thinks to herself. They get a spot to sit, and he goes first. “Sit here”, he motions in front of him, between his legs.

“Nope, I am good here”, she says and sits beside him. “OK! Drink up”, he tells her, motioning to the juice. “This Juice is tasteless, maybe because of being exposed to the sunlight all day”, she says. “Just drink it to fill up your stomach with water”, he tells her as he downs his bit.

“So, do you have a child”, he asks her. “No, no children yet”, she answers. “God will give you a very cute baby”, he tells her. “Thank you. How do you know?” she asks. “Because I will be the father to your baby”, he answers her. Don’t flatter yourself. She thinks.

“You told me you don’t have a baby and you’re single, why don’t you ask about me?”, he enquirers of her. “Oh, tell me about yourself”, she feigns interest.

“Well, I have a wife and two children, but I just liked you at first sight”, he says. Silence. “Not that I usually like women randomly, it’s just that my blood was attracted by you”, he explains. Silence. “Why are you quiet? I feel you are mad at me. At least I told you the truth, other people lie to get into a relationship”, he continues.

“First, there’s no relationship you are referring to. This cannot happen”, she answers. “What made you marry your wife?” she asks him. “I will not tell you today, maybe later”, he says. “OK! Whatever it is, just go, remember it and stay with your wife”, she tells him.

“How old  are your children?” she asks. “Six years and nine months”, he answers. “How long have you been married?” she asks. “Seven years”, he answers. “Wow! I’d rather stay single for the rest of my life than take another woman’s husband. I don’t do married men!” she exclaims.

“Escort me to the bus stop, I think my work here is done”, she tells him, getting up to go. She leaves her half full glass of tasteless fruit juice propped on the grass. He follows her. “Next weekend I shall take you to Ngong Hills for an outing”, he tells her. “Make sure you invite your wife”, she answers.

Image credit